You sit at home on a Saturday night, when everyone else is out partying, wondering how do I get her back. The first question is why do you want her in your life again. Is the loneliness just too large or was there something special about this woman that you saw in no one else. Will re-uniting solve the problems that caused the separation, or perhaps the problems aren't clear to you.
There may be a break down in critical communication that's created a temporary rift or the damage could be irreparable. You alone know why you want to re-start or continue the relationship, which aren't the same.
When couples first date in the glow of their own making some amazing distortion from reality allows a justification for their "new love." It's certain that couples learn to "accept you for what you are, to overlook certain traits. This is not a first date happening. In fact, it's rarely happened on the 6th or 7th date.
Is it possible that there was a third person in this story? Did you say to her when confronted, "It was just one night, she didn't really matter!" If that's the situation, there has been a serious crash in the department called trust. Women tend to know that men who wander once may have other do that again. The challenge of re-building trust is large.
Maybe she did the wandering but discovered that the guy did matter and now you sit at home. Let's put cards on the table. People in strong relationships rarely reach out for another. Without being hard on yourself ("Oh what did I do wrong?") look at where the relationship could have been stronger.
Was there strong respect in your relationship? On both sides? In discussions did you respect her point of view, appreciate her abilities, did you respect her sexuality and body, were you kind to her friends and family? This definitely had to be reciprocal. Love and trust are not possible without respect. Examine the relationship as though it were another person's story. After that you may have your own answer to how do I get her back.
Begin there. Ask questions of yourself until you get answers. Only then ask yourself how do I get her back.
There may be a break down in critical communication that's created a temporary rift or the damage could be irreparable. You alone know why you want to re-start or continue the relationship, which aren't the same.
When couples first date in the glow of their own making some amazing distortion from reality allows a justification for their "new love." It's certain that couples learn to "accept you for what you are, to overlook certain traits. This is not a first date happening. In fact, it's rarely happened on the 6th or 7th date.
Is it possible that there was a third person in this story? Did you say to her when confronted, "It was just one night, she didn't really matter!" If that's the situation, there has been a serious crash in the department called trust. Women tend to know that men who wander once may have other do that again. The challenge of re-building trust is large.
Maybe she did the wandering but discovered that the guy did matter and now you sit at home. Let's put cards on the table. People in strong relationships rarely reach out for another. Without being hard on yourself ("Oh what did I do wrong?") look at where the relationship could have been stronger.
Was there strong respect in your relationship? On both sides? In discussions did you respect her point of view, appreciate her abilities, did you respect her sexuality and body, were you kind to her friends and family? This definitely had to be reciprocal. Love and trust are not possible without respect. Examine the relationship as though it were another person's story. After that you may have your own answer to how do I get her back.
Begin there. Ask questions of yourself until you get answers. Only then ask yourself how do I get her back.
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